Library Management 101

Here are reasons to call your manager on a day off:
-the building caught on fire
-someone died
-the mayor showed up for a visit and things went well
-the director showed up for a visit and praised the staff
-a drug bust went down in the men's bathroom
-an employee stood up in the middle of story time and decide that 10 pages into Lola goes to the library, it was time to quit the library.

Here are reasons NOT to call your manager on a day off:
-to report what was served for lunch during feed a kid day
-to report how many kids showed up for a program
-to ask why we are out of tape
-to wonder what happened to that one guy that used to work here 10 years ago
-to ask where we keep the calculators. YOU ARE IN THE LIBRARY. I'M RUNNING AROUND DOING ERRANDS. I'M DRIVING. ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR EVER LOVIN' MIND?!?!?!??!?!

And now, now, now, my phone rings because some dumbfuck forgets to show up for work. You were supposed to be at work at 1 and now it's 4 and you wonder why I drink, Barb. How do you forget to show up for work? Are you kidding me?

Who's Barb?

Barb, Barb Lahey. If you haven't watched the Trailer Park Boys, I highly recommend it. I'm a little bit Jim Lahey, a little bit Julian, a little bit Bubbles.

I'd give you more information, but I have to go scream at someone now. But, someone not showing up for work, well, yeah, that's a reason to call.

Now, if I could predict lottery numbers like I predict this bullshit, I'd be sleeping on a pile of money and Louis Vuitton. Well, not him, because he's dead, but his bags.